Do you know the differences between magical thinking... positive thinking... and practical visioning?
It's something I talk about a lot to mentoring clients, and in seminars, but the whole tangle of concepts has really come to a head this week for various reasons.
I'll skip the confidential, proprietary stuff, so the people involved will continue to confide in me. Let me though share with a few examples I can responsibly talk about in public, to bring this to light:
- Perry Marshall, who for my money is one of the most brilliant entrepreneurial thinkers alive today, sent out an email about what he calls "Stockdale's Paradox." The essence of his message is that those who blindly believe in a euphoric, utopian future have not protected themselves against the inevitable bumps and turnbacks that confront every human being on the path to greater success. But those who anticipate the rough stuff will get through it so they can enjoy the pleasures of the land of milk and honey at a later time.
- John Carlton, an extraordinary copywriter and keen student of human reality, posted in his blog recently that "Your biology is set against you. All your plans will likely go for naught, because we aren’t wired to change without drastic motivation." His point: Don't just set goals. Get some very powerful emotional juice behind those goals, or you might just find that nature will do it for you, in a most less than delightful way. Like: Modify that Type A behavior, or a heart attack just might do it for you.
- A friend I had lunch with, whom I shall not name, is on the brink of such stellar success you wouldn't believe it if I told you. I wouldn't believe it if I hadn't known him for over a decade. The success is a done deal; what was surprising to him (but not to me) was how uneasy he feels about the whole thing. It's not that he doesn't feel he deserves it; he just had no idea his experience would be the way it has turned out to be.
My comment to him: "You know, when all the motivational experts and success coaches and New Age gurus told us to go for our dreams, they left out one very important element: how much anxiety there would be along the way."
My friend laughed. It was not a bitter laugh or a nervous laugh. It was the laugh of recognition.
And so - you have the perfect right to ask - what does this all have to do with copywriting?
A couple of things.
One: We are without question in the sector of society known as The Dream Merchants. If you resist that idea, try selling something based on the downside alone. Banal, gritty reality has a really limited market, and I've found most of those folks don't like to spend their money.
Yet we're not liars, Seth Godin notwithstanding. We are looking on the sunny side of the street to help convince others to come over and join us. But yes, alas, there will be cracks in the sidewalk, mud puddles and the occasional pothole. Even on the sunny side of the street.
Two: Success is inevitable if you keep at it long enough. But having success look, sound, feel and be just the way you imagined it is very unlikely. I was talking to a friend of mine about a very rich client of his, and I quizzed him:
"You know what millionaires have that's bigger that what most other people?"
His snappy response: "Bigger appetites?"
True that. But what I had in mind was: bigger problems.
Many people consciously or unconsciously choose not to succeed, to grow, to change, for exactly that reason. They don't want to deal with learning how to deal with bigger problems. I can understand that. It's not the most fun part of the job.
But suppose you are willing? What then?
There's no one-size-fits-all answer that I've come across, but as a starting point, consider the works of Robert Ringer. One of his concepts is "Positive Thinking With The Expectation of a Negative Result."
Interesting concept.
No, it doesn't mean defeatist thinking (that's what most people do -- the ones who would rather fight than switch. The ones who are not willing to grow in order to change).
It means... know what you want. Go for your goal. Be totally ready and willing for things not to work along the way. Because sometimes they won't.
When that happens, cut your losses and try another approach. Keep going.
After a few renditions of this little dance, you will get pretty good when it comes to improvising positive solutions at the razor's edge.
David Garfinkel
Publisher, World Copywriting Newsletter
Check out this very amusing video Jim Edwards just posted today about "5 bad words you should never use online!" ...
